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Imaginary Crush

I keep thinking

Wondering all the time

First time I heard about you

Who are you?

It’s all about you...

It’s spinning around my head...my world

the story about you

keep coloring my days

Still not so sure why there’s a sound in me

keep haunting me

Awaiting to hear story of you

Since I heard your beautiful name.
I try to tell myself
It is just another someone story,

But...there’s something inside that’s makes me want to know more about you,

Days passed by,

Trying to climb up to the dreams,

Going own my way.

wish to hear another story about you...

And hoping that I will see you one day,

maybe...Someday

Trying getting you out of my mind

Thinking I’m going crazy this time...

I try to tell myself,

It’s just a crush...trying to run away from the feeling

I hope I can

To push away the feeling

Cause I never get to know you and to know who you are...

I'm Back

Hye..I'm back..Life been so busy lately, but I'm not yet leaving..just disappear for a while.. It's December..and I can't wait for Mr.Christmas...Hohoho :)


Love,
Dee

Missing You...

forever goodbye..

Dad,
I know you've been gone exactly 11 years today...
but I am sending you this message
to let you know
you've never been forgotten...
you'll stay in my hearts for always..
I love you and miss you so much!


Love,
bb

I Wish You Could Be Happy - Snow Patrol

You could be happy and I won't know
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go

And all the things that I wished I had not said
Are played in loops 'till it's madness in my head

Is it too late to remind you how we were
But not our last days of silence, screaming, blur

Most of what I remember makes me sure
I should have stopped you from walking out the door

You could be happy, I hope you are
You made me happier than I'd been by far

Somehow everything I own smells of you
And for the tiniest moment it's all not true

Do the things that you always wanted to
Without me there to hold you back, don't think, just do

More than anything I want to see you, girl
Take a glorious bite out of the whole world

Lyrics that explain exactly how you feel ..

my heart script

Life is complicated ...
since the end
of too many things happened ..
All I can do is ...
I can only express it through lyrics and songs...
Lord, all I wish is Happiness..
a smile on my face..

Nicest Things

All I know is that you're so nice
You're the nicest thing I've seen
I wish that we could give it a go
See if we could be something

I wish I was your favourite girl
I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world
I wish my smile was your favourite kind of smile
I wish the way that I dressed was your favourite kind of style

I wish you couldn't figure me out
But you'd always wanna know what I was about
I wish you'd hold my hand
When I was upset
I wish you'd never forget
The look on my face when we first met

I wish you had a favourite beauty spot
That you loved secretly
'Cause it was on a hidden bit
That nobody else could see
Basically, I wish that you loved me
I wish that you needed me
I wish that you knew when I said two sugars,
Actually I meant three

I wish that without me your heart would break
I wish that without me you'd be spending the rest of your nights awake
I wish that without me you couldn't eat
I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep

Look, all I know is that you're the nicest thing I've ever seen
And I wish that we could see if we could be something
Yeah I wish that we could see if we could be something

Alone

alone

No one can see the pain that we hide,
They're happy for us to keep it inside,
Our fear is our own; they don't want to know,
Why should we involve them; why should it show.

You live your whole life in confusion and fear,
The need to feel something unbearably near,
Half of you living, Half of you gone,
And inside you know what your doing is wrong.

The thing's that can help, the thing's that may heal,
Are the flame or the blade and the sting of the steel,
The destruction of skin means the death of your soul,
But there's nowhere to run when your living alone.

Jayesslee - Officially Missing You

Ahah; its cute..plus the animation.. <3

*thumbs up* :)

Say Goodbye..?

If I seem distant
Baby I am
Words are like scissors in your hands
And there's no script to follow
So I just close my eyes
That way it won?t hurt so much
When we say goodbye

I feel just like an actress
Up on the stage
I can't believe
What i'm hearing myself say
And the porch light is my spotlight
So I play along with this life
That way it won?t hurt so much
When we say goodbye

Did you ever love me?
Does it even matter?
Did you even notice the whole world shatter?
I just want to hold you 'til you know i'm sorry
But I just keep it all inside
That way it won?t hurt so much
When we say goodbye

My heart feels like a circus
it's to much to take in
it's hard to lose love
But you were my best friend

So I walk this high wire
Alone?.tonight
That way it won?t hurt so much
When we say goodbye

That way it won?t hurt so much
When we say goodbye

New Chapter In IPGBL

It was a fairytale for me to be here.. trying so hard few times before and here I am now. It's like a dream come true.. I'm blessed to have this opportunity plus my intake mostly are Sarawakian group..so it is more easy for me in term of the culture and language.

My first week was like .. Oh Gosh! I never thought it's going to be so packed and hethic like this..? I was like, dying in the first place. (especially during the orientation week) where I fell sick and got this migraine and some sort of thing..mixed feeling and homesick..but now..thank God. I can handle it. :) yippie!
Every Saturday and Sunday is like feeling in paradise for me..because I can relaxing my mind and body from doing anything..but now, they booked my Saturday for our replacement class for raya..and I can only have time to relax on Sunday. My oh My... it was like an Army Camp in the making..haha
The first and second week for me is like oh God, I wanna go back! I want my family and friends.. I can't take this anymore...but i the end..I found this new chapter of life quit interesting..too many to explain why I am still here until today..Me myself keep wondering..Am I supposed to be here..really..? Is this what I want..? erm, I believe God has a plan in our lives..for sure to be a teacher is not an easy job..it's to deal with the life of our new generations. So, hopefully I'll be an inspired teacher for my future students..hopefully :)
So, it's the almost a month here in IPGBL..I kinda like what I'm doing now..wake up early in the morning and back home late in the evening..sometime have to go for the night class. Interesting right..? yeah oh yeah.. :P
So, this coming Monday will be our B.I.G camp in Pulako santubong...yea, I'm exited about it..I love a adventure! can't wait to do those kind of things such as rock climbing..mount climbing..Kayaking..singing and dancing in the jungle...what else arh..?? So, hopefully everyone will be happy and enjoy!

I'll be leaving soon

It's a bit frustrated to leave when you never thought of it...I hate this feeling, but I have to. There's still 3 days left. I wish I could stay more longer but... I have come out with this decision so hopefully everything will be OK then. At the moment I just can't think of any plan to be done..but I think I need to be free from this whole situation and will come back with the new "me". Lord, I still believe everything happened, there's is a reason of it.

While counting the days to leave the place..I wanted to give "all out" of me so that I'll be leaving for good and I can satisfied myself too. But I know I'm going to miss those funny, crazy and enjoyable people who had become my good friend. Dear Jeyanthy, Faridah, Martin and some of the respectful senior teachers. All though we have known each others in just short period of times..but I am pretty sure I had a very best moment with you guys.

Hopefully the friendship we had made will be last forever...and forget me not.

Rejected!

Lord..help me

Can anyone hear me?
Does anyone see me?
Why,Why do you treat me this way.
I am feeling rejected,
Or is it because i am?
What did i do,to deserve this pain?

This is not what i want.
So will someone tell me why i am
Being rejected.
I just want to know whats going on.
and what did i do to make me invisible to you.

I can see that I'm not wanted.
I can see that I'm rejected.
But for doing what?
How can you treat someone this way?
But i will never know why,
i am so rejected.

p/s~ This poem is about being rejected, it is just a poem i mean i was kinda thinking about it..

i dedicate this to someone who make others feel this way..

God Bless You

Yes! I got it..

my dreams

I received a good news yesterday..a bit worry to check the result at first but then I realised if this is what God want for me..nothing can take it away from me. Thank God! I'm IN for the interview. Still a long journey to go..hopefully everything is going to be fine. There's still another round left. Lord, I know nothing is impossible in You and I take this a beautiful gift from You even though I know it can be "Yes" or "No" result in June. ~ ^_^

Two Is Better Than 1 ~ ^_^ ~

I Loike this...

~^_^~

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I was too lazy for everything...~ :(

Don't Worry be Happy~

It was a silent midnite...
I feel so sleepy..
But couldn't sleep..
I was oversleept this evening..
Wanted to study...But I was too lazy..
What about tomorrow..?
Argh..sigh...
What Am I going to answer during the exam..
Oh God..
I was too lazy this week..
I feel bad..selfish..lazy girl
A tiring week..
Bad Mood..
My lazyness broke me down...
I wish i could go somewhere I can release..
every emotion I keep inside..
Lord..forgive me..
I wish I can do my best for tomorrow..
Chayok2x Dee...



In God's Glory
Dee ~ 12.33am

Oprah's No Phone Zone Campaign

Have you heard about Oprah's No Phone Zone Campaign? It was on using cell phones while driving. This show was a total eye-opener... I cannot help but post this. If you have the time, click THIS. Its very well-done and definitely worth your time.

Then take the pledge HERE

Why Do Women Cry?

~ Tears in Heaven~

A little boy asked his mother “Why are you crying?”
“Because I’m a woman,” she told him.

“I don’t understand,” he said. His Mom just hugged him and said,“And you never will”
Later the little boy asked his father, “Why does mother seem to cryfor no reason?”

“All women cry for no reason,” was all his dad could say.
The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to God; and when God got on the phone, he asked,

“God, why do women cry so easily?”

God said: “When I made the woman she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world; yet,gentle enough to give comfort”

“I gave her an inner strength to endure child birth and the rejection that many times comes from her children”

“I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining ”

“I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt her very badly”

“I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart”

“I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly”

“And finally, I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed.”

“You see: The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears,the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.”

“The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that isthe doorway to her heart - the place where love resides.”

Every Woman is Beautiful!

~Dear Women...never say that you're ugly..You are always beautiful inside and outside..~ ^_^

Happy Easter Day

He is Risen..!

Easter

is the most important

annual religious feast as per Christian year.

It is believe that Jesus was resurrected from the dead on the third day from his crucifixion.

Christians celebrate this resurrection on Easter day or Easter Sunday.

Easter day is a great spring celebration for Christians

which sends a message to everyone

that God loves all.

~God Bless Everyone~

^_^

It's a climb

I have a dream

It was "unbelievable"
To have the second opportunity
Never thought of this few weeks ago
yea..it's true ..
We will never know how God working His plans in this life...
Everything happened...it’s happened for a reason....
There’s a time to laugh...a time to cry..a time to fail...a time to success..
a time to breath and a time to die...

I was like "wow"!
and...
Praise the Lord coz I got a chance to prove myself again..
..i wanted the best for me..and my family
I know its sound like a "BIG DREAM"
..Kind off...but not really..

^_^

Just that... I wish I can do something in life
I believe everyone wanted to be "somebody"
To hold something that I can be proud of...
It was like I am fighting for a better future...
Climbing as high as you can...
I totally believe God also always fight for our future...
Giving as much as He can
Because His love for us...

Every time I thought there's no hope for something
He brings me back...To see dreams he has created for my future...
How I couldn't see those wonderful things He has done..?
Papa J...thanks for everything.. :)

In God's Glory....

Dee Luke ^_^

Today...I feel alive~

I feel Alive!

Today
As I woke up in the morning...
I feel wonderful
Inside and outside
He is the one

...who rebuild the spirit in me
Encourage me...

and

strengthen me
To move on
No matter what happen
In life
I believe He never will forsaken me
Neither leaves me
Cause deep inside of me
There’s will always hope in Him
That will never have end...

Why it has to be this way..?

Lord.. stick with me

I realize
It feels like something is goin wrong
Have plan it well..
Struggle for it...
A dreams that I always longing for

But...

don’t know why

It's seem to be so hard for me
Did I've done anything wrong?

Or God have another plan for me...?

Maybe it’s not what God want me to be
I guess..

Or else..I have to wait again...?
I feel pain ...such a failure in me
Broken inside...nobody know
How’s it feel to be waiting again
Why? Why everything has to be this way...?
don’t I deserve it...?

I'm trying so hard...
to be better person...and have a better life...
What should I do...?
should I change my mind...?

And dream of another dreams????

Rest In Peace ^_^

Dearest to the persons who I used to called family in Christ. Guys, you’ll always be in our heart and thought. Even though we’ve known each other just for short quality of time...but every moment and memories had touched my heart through the kindness of yours hearts.

God loves you more than we do and losing such a great persons like you guys will be deeply missing by us. In everything that had happened for the past few weeks we considered it as such a nightmare that never been thought by everyone of us. But we still believe in God...He has a reason for it. Till we meet again in God’s Hope...Rest in Peace

In everlasting memory
Uncle Deng, Auntie Unyang, Gabriel Isaac & Jacquelyn Usun

New Chapter

Hope

Starting a new job isn't fun. Never imagined it could be this busy...way to different from the last year schedule. Almost every day I have to wake up early in the morning and come back late in the evening...I feel tiring all day long. Can’t wait to go home early.. It’s definitely far away different from my previous experiences...but 1 thing still remain the same...the word “temporary”..me myself also don’t know when will the word “temporary” will be gone in me.

Starting this new job can be considered as another waiting point for me in hoping new hope in searching a job. I know I’m a bit stressful and blameless to be waiting again. But, I believe there’s a reason of everything that happened in life.

Yes, I am so excited but very nervous as well, very full of doubts... Will I like my new work place? Will my future colleagues treat me nice? Will the work itself justify me and everyone around me? Can I deliver everything effectively? Will I maintain my composure and won't get overwhelmed...

I have to say it again, this is definitely a new journey... I am hoping to conquer and hurdle strongly. I need to battle myself out of my comfort zone, I can make a difference.In your hands my Lord, I pray.